I almost punched this woman in the face tonight at work. There was a sale tag on some Hershey kisses, and on the tag it says that you need to look in the sale ad for the coupon.
So, it’s 9:58 and we close at 10 o’clock. She puts this bag of candy on the counter, I scan it, and total the sale. Then she decides to double check the price, realizes that it “did not scan correctly”, when in fact it did. She snatches the candy off of the counter and walks back to the candy aisle, where the sale tag clearly states that there is a coupon required to get the sale price. I point this out to her, then she tells me that I’m stupid and don’t know what I’m talking about.
So then we go through the process of price verifying EVERY FUCKING TYPE OF HERSHEY’S KISS ON THE GODDAMNED SHELF. Eventually, she gets frustrated, calls me stupid one more time, and leaves the store in a huff at exactly 10:07. I almost needed someone to come bail me out of jail. I was about two seconds away from a harassment lawsuit.
All this would have been avoided if she had read the fine print. Seriously.
But, some introspective good came out of this. It boils down to this:
1. That woman is going to have some cosmic groin kick in the near future because she’s a stupid bitch.
2. I shouldn’t worry about what she thinks. I mean, who cares about what illiterate people think?
3. She walked into the closed door on the way out and almost broke her neck because her nose was so far up in the air.
There. I feel better. On to less vile things.
“I want someone to think about me as soft and girly, not just someone you call when you get into a fight or need to tip over a truck.”
I can identify with this so strongly, it felt like an epiphany.
I want someone to think of me like a good book. Good books never get old, every time you read it you notice more details. It is rich in story and beautiful.
I want someone to read me, to notice my details, to memorize my flow and meter, someone to catch the syntax, to revel in the diction, to dive so deeply into me they cease to see the outside world and only live in my world.
I want someone to read my fine print.
I also want to remove my head from the clouds and place it back in reality. We rarely get what we want, and never when we want it.
